journal entry #91

hey nigras wassup? i have not been here for a while. and i dont miss it. but i need to use this as a communication and reflection tool. right now i am not doing so hot. all of the work that i have done on myself is coming undone. either i really did not do it for myself or i cannnot do it without multiple people backing me up. i do no tknow wha tit is, but i think i need to work alot harder than i thought on this problem. i have to rewire myself from the bottom if i want to do it. it is actually about wanting to do it, and not wanting to fuck off. cause that is all tha ti want to do is fuck off and play my guitar, adn learn about my guitar. i want to do that research project, but everything else has gotten in the way of me doing it. but, as oyu can clearly see, i havent really been trying on my work and i thin it is about time that i do that and i try to organize my mind. right at this moment, what i am trying to do is set up me da yin half-hour segments, and do it that way. ast 5:00 i am calling greg and steve and seeing wha tthey are doing. that is in eleven minutes and i hope my dad doesnt walk in and is drunk. he just walked in and isnt. so i am glad. and i am still doing my work. anmd it is time to go so ill see you bitch, bye whitey.